jigglephysics | Nothin's Gonna Hurt You, Baby

Nothin's Gonna Hurt You, Baby

[ It's been a long haul to adapt to the life they're all living now. Shino had been in the CGS for longer than everyone but Eugene. But Eugene had had a life of comfort before his family's fallout. Shino never had the sheltering Eugene had. There were never any expectations for him growing up. It wasn't until after Tekkadan had formed that he finally found some purpose and future to strive for with his own efforts. Orga had given that to all of them, and now he can make an honest living beside.

Well.

Someone he didn't think would become so important. It's not that Yamagi had never meant anything before. He was family just like anyone. It really wasn't until the fight in Edmonton that he really started paying Yamagi such specific mind. Sure, he'd hung out with him more as they started to work together more closely. Who knew it'd end up with Yamagi falling for him? By the time Yamagi was his mechanic and his mechanic only, he felt like they could be thick as thieves.

And then he'd paid attention to the way Yamagi looked at him when he came by to check on the status of Ryusei-Go's maintenance. The way he ruffled when he got too close. Once the signs became clearer, he figured out his feelings more easily that Yamagi might have liked. It was more from someone that a guy like him could ever hope for, those feelings of love. He'd spent his time since giving him openings to act on them and learning how to let that love into his own heart. It wasn't easy for the older CGS crew to look at love and accept it.

And now he's lugging boxes for him, using his strength to do what he does best. Yamagi's thicker than he used to be in build from all the hard work, but he's still not on par with Shino's mass. He's happy to trot at his heels as a trainee for a new maintenance procedure. Yamagi's patient enough to teach him but hard enough to keep him in line and he enjoys it. He gets to tease the hell out of him when he's bored and learn new things when he's into it. He can keep his hands working here at the old man's company, too, so it all works out for him. ]

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[ having shino here, working with him, is more than he could have ever imagined, let alone asked for. having shino come back battered up but safe is more than he could have ever looked up at the stars shino loves so much and prayed for. this must be the closest thing to happy he's ever been, having so much time to spend with shino like this, learning more about him and seeing all his different colors. yamagi can't help but feel like he's waited for this opportunity for such a long time, the opportunity to have a life spent close to shino, to work alongside him and prove his own worth.

and yet.

there are still unspoken... feelings between them. yamagi doesn't expect shino to reciprocate. he still hasn't said anything, but spending every day with him just makes them stifling, suffocating, harder and harder to bear and keep up with hiding. he can't help but wonder whether or not shino's figured it out yet — they'd been so close when shino had gone on that mission back then, so close that yamagi might have summoned the courage to act had there not been the barrier of helmets between them. since then, though...

well, they hadn't gone drinking like shino promised or even touched the subject, and yamagi had to wonder if what he thought was there might have just been a delusion stemmed from desperation. shino has stopped talking about taking him out to meet girls, though. there's that. progress.

yamagi keeps telling himself he just hasn't found the right moment, but deep down, he knows that's not it. it's just that he still can't be sure it's alright, and he's... still scared. scared that shino won't accept him, or much worse; knowing that he will accept him but nothing more and that it won't be enough for yamagi's selfish heart. he doesn't remember what it's like to not love shino norba with his entire being. there are times his heart feels like it's about to burst.

at the moment, yamagi is hauling boxes, too, a thin sheen of sweat covering his forehead and making stray strands of hair stick to it. shino is better in this particular area. yamagi's shoulders are trembling with effort, but he doesn't need help, he's fine —

and with a startled yelp, yamagi realizes that he's a good three seconds from dropping them and toppling over. he's gotten stronger, but not strong enough to carry a couple of boxes of equipment, apparently. ]

Shino — !

[ his ears are burning with embarrassment before his name even comes out of his mouth, but he's more concerned with the fact that his knees are about to buckle. ]

[ It only takes one yelp to get him moving. Given what Yamagi and he are up to, he's certain there's about to be some damaged toes only saved by steel-enforced boots real soon. He sets his stuff down fast, almost dropping it himself, before rushing over. He gets his hands up under the bottom box in Yamagi's stack. He pushes his fingers under Yamagi's and lifts to release him from the weight. ]

Here, here, got iiit!

[ as soon as shino swoops in and grabs the stack of boxes, yamagi loses his balance and stumbles face first into shino's chest. it's a much better result than straight up collapsing, but it takes him a good few seconds to look up at shino, much too close despite the height difference. ]

... S-Sorry. Thanks. For that.

[ he wants to cringe at how awkward he sounds, but he resists and backs off to dust himself off. his cheeks are an interesting shade of pink, coloring his pale complexion, fingers tingling from where shino brushed them. he swears he'll never stop feeling like a teenage girl with a pathetic crush.

yamagi manages to offer shino a tremulous smile. ]

I came this close to breaking a toe or two.

[ He holds up his hands quickly so Yamagi doesn't fall into the boxes. He doesn't want him to hurt his face right when he'd been saved. It's a strain, but Shino can handle it.

He grins down at him, apparently relieved. ]

Yeah, yeah! You okay, Yamagi?

[ He lowers his arms and shifts the boxes against himself to keep them safely propped against his chest. Ah, he's blushing. Poor guy. He blushes so easy and suffers from looking so cute in the meantime. No wonder he has to be so sharp tongued to the rookies on staff to keep respect in his favor. Even in his twenties, he's a beauty for sure, now with a face on full display. ]

Gotta watch those! They're a bitch to deal with. Feels like it takes forever to heal and then you're stuck waddling around for like a month.

[ He shifts his feet around to punctuate. ]

I used to drop them all the time when I first got into the CGS. I was a little guy but I was big enough that they still loaded me up with equipment boxes. But the more you do it, the easier it gets, right?

Yeah, I'm okay. Thanks.

[ he makes a worried face, apparently concerned with the fact that shino has probably broken every single one of his bones at least once. ]

It gets easier, yeah, but you're so —

[ he can't help it; he covers his mouth with a hand to stifle a laugh, a fresh blush blooming. he almost looks guilty, but he's less embarrassed than he was before. a bit more cheerful. he wonders if shino was trying to make him feel more relaxed on purpose. whether he was or wasn't, it worked; shino tends to have that effect. with a shrug of his shoulders, he falls into step beside him, not wanting to keep shino stranded with those boxes. he directs him to where they need to be set down. ]

Sorry, it's admittedly just... a little hard to imagine you and little. It's such a pain getting the kids working under me to treat me as a superior when a handful of them are taller than me, you know? Being in charge is hard to get used to.

[ a thoughtful pause as his gaze shifts back to shino, a teasing glimmer in his eyes. ]

But say I start working out tomorrow. How long do you think it'll take me to match up to you?

[ never mind that this job is enough of a workout. yamagi laughs again, more freely this time. he almost reaches out to give shino's bicep a playful squeeze — but he thinks better of it and allows his hand to drop, fingers twitching with the sore lack of something to touch. ]

Edited 2017-05-24 21:40 (UTC)

Haha, I was little long before you got here. I was a skinny lil' guy back then.

[ He walks along, grinning to himself and carrying the boxes effortlessly. He's better at following instructions than giving them which is why he's glad Nadi never burdened him with some management position here. He's happy to be a grunt worker for life.

He sets the boxes down carefully and dusts off his hands on his hips. ]

I don't got any pictures, though, you'll have to take my word for it.

[ He hums thoughtfully and rubs his chin, head jaunted to the side as he looks Yamagi over. It's not like Yamagi didn't work out in his own way. He just... was a mechanic, not a fighter. His muscles were compact and defined for his work. He's not like the rest of them. ]

It's gonna take a while, I think. But you don't haveta get big. I'm here! Hehehe! Just get big enough that you won't drop boxes on your toes.

[ i'm here. yamagi has to keep himself from swooning. right. shino's here. shino's here, with him, and he's not going anywhere. it's still hard to wrap his head around, but the proof of that reality is looking him in the eyes and smiling like the sun. ]

That's right. What on Earth would I do without you?

[ yamagi is going for sarcasm, so he turns his head to hide a bashful smile after rolling his eyes. ]

Anyway, that's... pretty much the last of it. There's nothing else on the agenda today. Everything's taken care of.

[ he keeps a dedicated mental checklist, and sure enough, handling those supplies was the last thing on it. yamagi shuffles his feet, not quite knowing what to do next. he... doesn't want to just. leave. even with shino working here, the time spent just the two of them is always so precious to him. he wants to hold onto that.

maybe this is an opportunity he's been waiting for. ]

Shino... Do you want to... um.

[ grab a drink together. use your words, yamagi. this should be simple. baby steps. he starts over, freeing his hair from its ponytail and letting it down just to do something with his hands. ]

Maybe we can go and...

[ damn it. he can't even look at him. you'd never guess he was giggling just a minute ago. the look in his eyes is helpless, just a little bit pleading. please, he thinks, just take the hint. yamagi doesn't drop them often. not on purpose, anyway. ]

Break all your toes!

[ It's a tease, but one in great humor. He's laughing as he grins, washed in relief that Yamagi had not, in fact, injured himself at all. It's little, but he enjoys those moments where he feels like he's being useful to him. ]

Wow, really? You always seem like you've got a huge list of stuff to do! I didn't think it even had an end to it.

[ He goes quiet as Yamagi starts speaking. He's struggling. Shino lets him try to work through it, exuding endless patience for him. All of this needs to be at Yamagi's pace. It's his show here. If he wants to do something, Shino's happy to agree, but Shino doesn't want to force Yamagi's hand. He wants Yamagi to be confident and comfortable with his feelings here.

Shino's still understanding his own heart in this situation, but he believes in the honesty of Yamagi's love. He wants to keep it strong and always growing. It's something that makes Yamagi shine and he deserves to come into it and himself in his own time.

He lets him get as far as he can and flutters as he watches his hair fall. He can't stop smiling. He can't stop looking at him. ]

You bet I do! Let's go together. You deserve to put your feet up!

[ He offers his hand to him. ]

[ shino is always, always useful to him, no matter what it is that he's doing. his presence alone is useful to him.

yamagi's heart catches in his throat, relief washing over him when shino just... understands. he returns the smile; his is much softer, the moon to shino's sun. only then does he realize that shino is holding his hand out to him.

he... didn't trip, did he? there's no reason to need to pull him along, so why is he looking at him like he's waiting for him to... no, it can't be as simple as that. right?

he looks back up at shino's smiling face, down to his outstretched palm, and back up again, searching shino's eyes for some sort of hint. there is none, though — just that same bright smile, as genuine as ever. another second ticks by, and as soon as he realizes that he's keeping shino waiting for no discernible reason, yamagi tentatively reaches his arm out and accepts it, slender fingers curling around shino's.

yamagi doesn't have soft hands. they're rough and calloused from the hours upon hours he's spent toiling with machines, and it's hard not to be self-conscious of it, but... something as small as the way his hand fits in shino's is enough to make his heart race. yamagi doesn't realize just how much his expression has softened, doesn't realize the quiet happiness that's written plain on his face.

when it occurs to him that he's just standing there, staring at their joined hands like a zombie, yamagi quite literally jumps and almost flinches away, burning with embarrassment. he doesn't, though, just gives shino's hand a squeeze to keep himself grounded to reality. miraculously, it works, and he presses on like those seconds of hesitation didn't just happen. ]

Come on, you know you've been working just as hard. You deserve to relax as much as I do. Is there anywhere in particular you have in mind? I don't get the chance to go out much, so...

[ he didn't exactly plan this far ahead. don't expect him to make any sort of decisions right now. ]

Edited 2017-06-19 19:14 (UTC)

[ Shino's amused by the little show of Yamagi processing the presence of his hand in his space. He really doesn't get it, does he? For him, it's this easy. Offering his hand and allowing Yamagi into his space? It's simple. He doesn't need to think deeply about it to want it. Yamagi's done enough to prove he's worth every bit of his time and attention when they're off the clock.

Shino's hands are just as rough. He things all the work pushed into the creases of Yamagi's palm feels nice. It puts them on even ground. Even with Yamagi's natural beauty, he still has that hard life they've all lived present on the harshness of his fingers. Only his gloves have saved him from the thicker, harsher pads that he and Nadi have from heavy lifting and years of cutting their hands open on scrap metal. ]

Hmmm, well, if it's us, I wanna go somewhere a lil' nice. You're not big on the whole topless bar thing hahahaha!

[ It's a joke and he wears his grin to punctuate it before softening his face. ]

Chryse is rough everywhere, but we can go somewhere a lil closer to the old compound and find one of the fixed up places. Low lights, top shelf liquor... let me spoil you a little, huh?

[ yamagi manages a half-hearted glare, despite how flustered he is. by now, his sexuality might as well be an open secret. ]

No topless bars, thanks.

[ he's still too oblivious to think that shino recognizes his feelings, though, and as far as he's concerned, things should... probably stay that way. it's not rejection he's afraid of; it's the inevitable acceptance before the rejection. it's the knowledge that shino would accept him regardless. that hurts the most.

when shino describes his Real idea, though, yamagi practically melts. that sounds suspiciously like a date. does shino even realize how he comes off? does he have any idea what he's doing to yamagi on a more and more regular basis?

but yamagi couldn't possibly turn that down. he can't hold his liquor, but shino doesn't need to know that, not after the promise they made. he has one question, though. ]

... It sounds nice. But why would you want to spoil me? Are you sure I'm worth spoiling?

[ self-deprecation is just second nature to him. ]

[ He figured that, but he loves to tease. He can't help it. It's in his bones. ]

Sure, sure, I know that hehehe.

[ Shino is in favor of his real idea anyway. It's closer to the thing he's wanted to do with him for a while. Yamagi, he's realized, is too skittish for a night out and then a night in, but he can at least get through the first half. Hormones be damned, Yamagi will always be worth the wait. ]

Haa? Yamagi, you're the most worth spoiling out of the lot of them! Are you kidding me? How much work have you done for me? Seriously! And besides....

[ He leans a little too close and flashes one of his more charming smiles for him. ]

Anyone who wouldn't want you on his arm for a night out is foolish. I can't imagine a better time than getting to look at that pretty face and listen to you talk about all kinda smart shit all night, Yamagi.

[ shino is so close, close enough to make his breath hitch before he swallows thickly. he's going to kill him, he thinks. shino is going to kill him. yamagi is going to die and it will be all shino's fault because he keeps doing this.

yamagi. needs a minute. he needs to remember how to form a coherent sentence and make words before he can speak. his heart is beating so fast he wouldn't be surprised if shino could somehow hear it, could read his mind and know just how much yamagi wants this, wants him, wants wants wants. instead, he breathes in and turns his head to look at shino, summoning all the courage he can muster just to meet his gaze, hyperaware of shino's smile so close to his ear. it would be so easy to just tilt his head and bridge the gap between them. ]

Sh... Shino.

[ he has to give in and avert his gaze when he continues, red to the tips of his ears. ]

What is this? Do you... do you even realize what you're...

[ crap. he's tripping over broken syllables, and... he can't bring himself to finish that thought. instead, he starts over, his voice cracking. ]

Never mind. I'd... Good. That sounds good. Yeah, I'd like that a lot.

[ not perfect, but it's something. he doesn't realize it, but his thumb is rubbing circles over the back of shino's palm, the repetitive motion soothing him. it's like he's tethered to reality by shino's hand alone. he's too good for him. yamagi doesn't deserve shino's kindness, not when it leads to him thinking about more, but he's selfish enough to drink it in and accept it regardless. ]

Please.

[ yamagi squeezes his hand, a silent plea to go ahead and get moving. ]

Edited 2017-06-23 06:50 (UTC)

[ Shino waits for him to work it out. He's given him a heavy stack of cards with those few sentences, but he likes to be honest. He likes to give openings. He wants to give Yamagi every opportunity to confront himself. Even if it takes a million tries, he'll keep trying to convince him he's worth this attention.

A swing and a miss. Oh well. He accepted the proposal, at least. That's enough for now. He gives Yamagi's hand a squeeze, flashes his wide smile, and stands upright again. ]

Sure thing. We're old enough to go out on the town, so let's hit it!

[ And off he goes. He supposes they're hoofing it. It's not like either of them have a car and it's not like he's about to call Atra to pick them up, either. They'll work up a thirst with the hike, right? ]

Has age ever stopped you from going out on the town before?

[ yamagi manages a small, teasing smile, glancing over at shino again. right. he doesn't let go of shino's hand once as shino leads him to the bar he mentioned. the walk isn't too bad, not when they're side by side like this, shoulders occasionally brushing and fingers tangling together. every little thing like that doesn't escape yamagi's notice. ]

Just... be patient with me, okay? Like I said, I don't get out very often.

[ and by not very often he basically means, well, never? yamagi is a workaholic and he's never had much interest in things like this, not until shino asked him to come along without the word girls involved. he more or less keeps to himself outside of work. this is different. this is something a little out of his comfort zone, and he's not about to pass this chance up just because of a little bit of nerves.

but more than anything else, he trusts shino to take care of him. as long as he doesn't get too reckless, anyway. what he described... it doesn't sound anything like the sleazy places he's mentioned slinking off to with eugene before. yamagi has no idea what to expect, his anticipation obvious.

yamagi turns and looks at him again when shino stops walking, humming with curiosity. he guesses they're here. ]

Is this it?

Edited 2017-06-23 08:07 (UTC)

Nope! If I was old enough to do all the crap I was doing, I figured I was old enough to have a good time. It was a lot harder when we weren't being paid.

[ He holds fast to Yamagi's hand, feeling very lucky to be the one who gets to do it. Yamagi's picky. He loves Tekkadan as much as any of them, but he's a lot more selective with his personal time. Ride, Takaki and Mika are the only ones who really get in on it. Eugene now that they've bonded, too, but not as much as Shino. Never as much as Shino. Other than Eugene, no one's ever seen him as this special. He's enthralled by it. ]

You've been patient with me. I'll be patient with you.

[ That's what's fair. ]

This is it. Let's go in, huh?

[ The inside is nice and full of replicant wood and tiles. It's still got the grimy stains of Mars in its corners, but compared to most places, it's charming and a little higher end. He'd saved money since the last year of 'Tekkadan'. He can afford to pay for a nice night for them.

He takes him up to the bar counter to sit and keeps hold of his hand so Yamagi can use him as a brace to climb up on the stool. ]

[ shino makes a very fair point. that, and his honest words make his chest constrict with warmth and happiness — shino seems to understand him more and more over time, little by little. he's grateful. when he compares himself to the others, yamagi guesses that he can be a difficult person to be patient with. ]

Mm. Okay.

[ yamagi allows shino to pull him inside, following him closely, acutely aware of the way their hands are still locked together. he offers him a delicate smile and squeezes his hand when he climbs up onto the stool, legs dangling just above the ground when he settled. it occurs to him that there's no real reason to keep holding it once he's seated and comfortable, but he's committed the feeling to memory, and he has to let go sometime. ]

Wow. You were right. This is... This is pretty nice. You weren't kidding when you said you'd spoil me.

[ he looks around and takes it all in, eyes wide. yamagi isn't used to places like this. it isn't a loud, rowdy bar, but a smaller, more intimate space, just like shino said. there are only a handful of other people around, and they're all in pairs of two.

pairs of two. dates. yamagi realizes, rather belatedly, that almost everyone else looks like they're on a date. so he was right to be suspicious after all... he chances a look at shino, tilting his head. a light blush is creeping onto his cheeks, hard to miss underneath the glow of the lights. ]

This is almost like a date, huh?

[ he did not mean to voice that thought aloud. it just slipped out, and once yamagi realizes what he just insinuated, he can't look at shino, not quite sure what kind of reaction to expect. instead, he stares down at the floor, suddenly finding it very interesting. he searches for something, anything to add on, anything to just brush it off as a joke, but he's coming up short.

perhaps it's because it wasn't a joke at all. what else could he possibly call this? just buddies hanging out? is that all it is? he doesn't know. he's confused and nervous and excited and hopeful and wow, drinking suddenly sounds like a better idea than it did ten minutes ago. maybe it'll help him relax. ]

Edited (HOURS LATER) 2017-06-26 09:09 (UTC)

I told you! I wouldn't kid about it, you know?

[ He doesn't look like he knows what he's doing and he doesn't act like it, either, but he does. He's thought about this a lot. He's revisited the ladies at the brothel he used to frequent to talk with them on a nice couch and ask him what kind of things he should do for him. He's even talked to Azee about it. He's been taking in good advice from those he trusts most about it.

Shino feels the eyes on him. He turns his head, smiling with confidence. ]

Ha? Yamagi, it is a date! I'm definitely considering this an after work date.

[ And that's that! He lifts a hand to wave the bartend down, waiting to hear what Yamagi might say about it. ]

[ oh. ]

Oh.

[ he swallows thickly. there's a long pause as he tries to process this information, but his brain may or may not have just short-circuited. a date. he's on a date. he's on a date with shino.

okay. this is fine. he's fine. ]

... Get me something strong.

[ nope, he's not fine. he has no idea how to handle this. he was not the least bit prepared, which all things considered he should be seeing as he was the one who was trying to ask shino out before shino filled in the blanks for him, but was he ever going to be prepared for this? deep, deep down, yamagi had started to realize that something like a date with shino didn't seem so impossible anymore awhile ago. he just hasn't known how to acknowledge that; the possibility that he's worth shino's attention. it still seemed so unreal, he just...

he runs a hand through his hair. ]

[ another minute passes before yamagi summons the courage to speak again. surprisingly, his voice doesn't tremble; his gaze is averted, but his words are thoughtful. ]

Earlier, I was trying to ask you out. That's probably obvious now, huh?

[ a short, breathless laugh. it doesn't do anything to ease the tension in his shoulders. ]

I've been trying, but I just freeze up, and when you filled in the blanks I just didn't know that you'd... I mean...

[ ugh. he's starting to stumble. breathe, yamagi. ]

I didn't want to just assume that this meant what I wanted it to mean.

Strong? Mmm, you sure? Well, if you say so.

[ He doesn't connect two and two well though he can sense his stress. He's not totally dense about these things. He's been out with enough people in his past. Just... not as seriously as this. Yamagi has genuine feelings he needs to be careful with here. He's trying to be conscious of everything he says. ]

Yup! Pretty obvious to me, at least.

[ And that smile of his softens for him. Yamagi's been so worried and maybe Shino's been worried, too. Maybe he's been a little afraid of investing in anything when Yamagi might get hurt. When he might be too ephemeral to bring Yamagi happiness. He's just had so many close calls, he's still afraid of tangible things and Yamagi is right here, too solid and too real.

He keeps on smiling for him, though, and he reaches to ruffle his hair fondly. ]

I can't say I totally know what I'm doing here and I can't say I totally know what it all means or how it works but... either way, let's do our best with this, Yamagi, okay?

Shino...

[ yamagi looks at him with eyes that are practically sparkling. he looks at him with all the adoration in the world, with all the affection in his heart and soul. when shino ruffles his hair, one eye flutters shut and he laughs, pretending to swat him away. ]

I don't know, either. I feel like I'm stumbling in the dark, but...

[ yamagi averts his gaze, color high on his cheeks. ]

You've been my light. That's not going to change. So I'll give this everything I have.

[ he hesitates to look back at him, but he chances it. ]

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Nothin's Gonna Hurt You, Baby

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yamagi already has A Thirst

shino is always parched

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